Happy Birthday Sean!!! Hope you had a good one.
Fear is not failure. Soon we are flying back to nz, and the kids will have to hold my hand and make me brave... they just think its hilarious. Family - there to support each other.
The only way you could let Rory down is to give up!!!
I don't see that happening, so cut yourself some slack. Brenda
Leigh, Leigh, Leigh
Where to begin....Nobody should have to endure what you are going through. I often find people ask me about you all and how you are all going. I start off with Rorys progress, tell them about the website so they can keep up with it all, and add...every time... what an inspiration you are and to take the time to read your updates. I believe you have changed the way alot of people live their lives. So to find yourself having to take a few moments to regroup yourself or to freak out a little is NORMAL. I agree with the others your children need to see how you react in all situations. Crikey I got sweaty palms just reading about the obstacle course! As Mums we all have moments we probably regret but that makes us human. So keep on Leigh, Sean Sam and Rory LOVE you! Right now I am sending you a big hug, take it and know we all love you and are right here if you need to have a moment!
Kody absolutley loved the weekend! Highlights for him were the hydroslide and the obstacle course. He had to have today off school to recover! Lots of Love Trudi Brian Kody Ben and Stella xxxxx
Oh my goodness Leigh, if only you could see yourself from where we sit. I'm sure a piece of my heart has fallen off while reading your last entry. I could just sob, but here I am swallowing it down so that my family don't ask me what's wrong...then I would have to explain it and I don't know if that's possible. Janes words were so true, if Rory only sees strong Mum, he won't have opportunities to help you like you help him. When we are in a dark place, sometimes the best way to move through it is to feel needed. That goes for all of us, including children. As a woman and a mother I relate to everything you write. I also am in awe of the things you do and have done from day 1. For some people, after being traumatised as your family has, just to leave the house is too scary...you have done so much, and you are hard on yourself because perhaps if you let go for just a moment, you may crumble. Even if that did happen Leigh, you would get up again. Pleeease love yourself, so that we all may continue to love you too.
hi again, i am with you there leigh on the heights - just ask logan i get dizzy, queezie and sick with heights and that is just me looking up from the ground up at something that is tall - I am the biggest wuss with heights so maybe I can keep you company on the ground!!! Just read your blog for today, and I can only say you need to be proud of all the hours you have endured so far - as parents yes you go the extra miles to do all you can, and the heartbreak involved is always high. But there is light at the end of this tunnel - you have given a million percent so far and rory and sam have wonderful courageous parents to show for it. No-one expects you to be the hard shelled bullet proof mum that you always seem to be - everyone has a breaking point and yours has been tested over and over again in the last many months. Dont ever feel like you are failing - not the case you are being a mum and a damn great one at that - and sean and you are doing amazing things to make your boys both very lucky and proud to call you their parents - if only every child in the world could be so lucky !!! love and hugs wendy jason logan and mikayla
Oh Leigh... you are so hard on yourself ... when those of us who read your blog are filled with admiration at your courage and insight and guts you are berating yourself at the two times where you were human... where you felt overwhelmed and couldn't be anything other than an overwhelmed human for a couple of minutes... isn't it ok for Rory to see that it is overwhelming occaisionally - doesn't that help him to see that he is right when he feels like that?? i don't know the answer to that - i just imagine that Rory feels loved and supported beyond measure and that that means you are doing an exemplary job... hell i had to take Eila to the dentist this morning and that ended in me having to be all stern with her to make her go through with it.. and that's only the bloody dentist... please Leigh be kind to yourself - you have too far still to go to be mean to yourself when you are doing the very best you can...
HAPPY LATE 10TH BIRTHDAY SAMMY!!! Uncle Graham and I have been catching up with all the happenings you and Rory have been up to - you have both been very busy! We are currently in La Paz - have seen lots of llamas, alpacas, lizards etc, thankfully no tarantulas...yet! We are thinking of you both as we continue our travels through South America. We think the absolute world of you both and are so proud of you - take care and lots and lots of love and hugs - Auntie Teri & Uncle Graham xxxx
Oh Leigh, I know how you feel. i too only got to the first log, crossed it then couldn't go on and had to turn around and return the way they sat you're not supposed to. But never feel like you've failed him. You have been fantastic. I know our struggles this year are very different but your thoughts often parallel mine on how to best support your sons when all you want to do is cuddle into bed and stay there and pretend this year had never happened. There is no manual for me on how to help my boys through their grief and confusion and not one for you either. So we do what we feel is right and give them love all the time and that is the right thing. If you wish to have a cuppa now you are in Whg and my school year is winding down, e mail is firstname.lastname@example.org. Remenber all we can do is our best and you are certainly doing that.
Hi Gardiner family
My name is Amber I would like to hold a fundraiser here in taranaki for your family for more info please feel free to get in touch.
love and light
Happy Birthday to you Sam!!! Woop woop 10 woop woop!!!
Sounds like you had a fantastic day. We are looking forward to seeing you all on Sat as well! New bikes ROCK!
And may I suggest Dargaville as a settling down place?????? hehehe